Yet more odd customers

One of my regulars showed up today just as I was about to leave, a strangely masculine woman who looks disturbingly the way I'd imagine my mother would if she had a botched sex change operation. I'm far from convinced this woman was born that way ...

Unlike the pair we knew as "the trannie and the hobbit", who were definitely male and female respectively but nonetheless utterly bizarre. We're talking about an unconvincing transvestite (who is the spitting image of Val Denton from The league of gentlemen) who manages to make a more attractive woman than his partner, despite clearly not wearing the trousers in any sense. It's disturbing stuff.

Mr Murray, who is positively normal by comparison, told me today, for the umpteenth time, that he really likes Tchaikovsky. I responded by repeating myself in my turn (recommending he listens to the Manfred symphony) and he didn't bat an eyelid. Bless.